FEMPIRE

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Rhapsody in Pink

words + visuals:
ninadass

I made my usual call to my mom the other day.
She said something weird to me.
Something really, really weird.
She said she was sorry.
She said she was sorry for being horrible to me.
For being a bad mom.
I was stunned.
She has never, never, ever apologised to me.
For anything.
This was a first.
I was silent.
I did not know how to respond.
She asked me to forgive her.
I said, 'okay'.
After all she's my mom.
But really I couldn't inside.
My life would have turned out very differently.
If they were nicer to me.
And I wasn't so afraid to come home everyday.
But in the end I left.
Never to return.
That was almost 10 years ago.
But I 'left' them earlier.
Eventhough I was physically there.
I told her a lot has happened to me.
Stuff she rather not know.
Stuff that would make her very guilty.
Stuff I will keep to myself.
Stuff that is mine.
I put the phone down.
I was silent for a long time.
I wish I could go home.
But I can't.
I took a piece a paper.
And wrote something to her.
I also attached a picture of me.
As a woman.
One that looks so remarkably like her wedding photograph.
She will get it anyday now.
She will call me anyday now.